SLOW AND STEADY WINS!!!!! PLAYOFFS 'ERE WE COME!

Kroxigoons FTW!

Slow and steady certainly seem to have won the race for the Kroxigoons who finished the regular season in FIRST PLACE!!! Well done to Coach Giles and his crew. 

It seems that the death of the Lich King had more effect on Coach Coffin's team than most would have thought - seeing him lose a crucial game and drop from 1st to 4th in the rankings. Coach Coffin seemed confident in the future of his team and was quoted as saying: "Following the death or Arthas there was a distinct drop in the old team magic - literally - as such the team did not perform well. I think that things have rebounded a bit and you will see some new life... er unlife?... in the team during the playoffs!"

Coach Craig was very impressed by the futile attempts of the Sunday Skullcrushers and has suggested that they may actually be starting to look like a team rather than the disorganized rabble we have all grown to love and loathe in equal measure.....

The Midnight City Nightmare have somehow garnered the first tournament buy and have reportedly used the time off to visit the Pulse training camp. What lightning fast tricks they will learn there is anybody's guess.

The Reavers have tied the Hooligans for 6th - surprising since the Hooligans are a virtual mystery to everyone in the league. Apparently Commissioneer Craig has been pulling some serious shennanigans this season...

Insiders are saying that the Morgue Fillers are looking strong on the field but may need to seek out a new coaching staff. No one has stepped forward thus far so Coach Nick may be safe for the time being... mabey

STATS Game 7 - Final regular season game - asserts rankings for opponents in the playoffs

1-0 Kroxigoons (L)168/ Coach Coffin (U) 154
1-0 The Stronghold Strongarms (D)162/ Manchester Morgue Fillers (C)58
3-1 C.F.L. (SL)165/ Sunday Skullcrushers (O)53
3-1 Whitetail Neptune Plague (SK)140/Akatruki's Hoard (N)56
0-0 Hildebrandt's Hooligans (O)130 = Riekland Reavers (H)130
0-0 Midnight City Nightmare (DE)112=Nuffle's Crusaders

Which means the following will be the seeding for

the first playoff round!

1 Kroxigoons (L)168 vs 6 Riekland Reavers (H)130
2 C.F.L. (SL)165 vs Akatruki's Hoard (N)56
3 Whitetail Neptune Plague (SK)140 VS Coach Coffin (U) 154
4 Sunday Skullcrushers (O)53 VS The Stronghold Strongarms (D)162
5 Hildebrandt's Hooligans (O)130 vs Nuffle's Crusaders (Buy)

Strongarm Drop Like A ROCK!!!!!

The premier game of the New Year saw the much anticipated match up between 4-1-0 C.F.L. led by Coach Craig and the undefeated 5-0-0 Stronghold Strongarms.

After all was said and done Coach Craig had this to say:


 "If I could, I think I would have to give my team's MVP award to Strongarm vet. player Gattil!!!! He fumbled more than some potted plants I know....

 But that being said I am very pleased with my Team today - they have learned a lot and earned a lot. Abraxus The Multiformed finally lived up to his role of being the team hammer. If today is any indication, having seriously injured Denovay the slayer and taking him out of the next game, there is much to believe in the words of those who say his best hits border on felonious assault.

Abraxus was also key, along with the brilliant plays of actual game MVP The Mighty Fecundus in holding down the Deathroller and ensuring that it had little impact in overall play. Thanks to Coach B himself for the insinuations regarding what their forges were working on in his previous interview - it really allowed us to be prepared for this mechanical monstrocity.

The Deathroller in action vs the C.F.L.

Fecundus was a monster today (technically, being daemonic and all, I guess he is a monster everyday - but I think you catch my meaning) and had a key role to play in all the major plays of the day. He is often underrated but has clearly become a major key to this team's play. The fleet footed catchers moved exceptionally, the linesmen supported and everything went pretty much to plan. Really it was the Dwarven inability to hang on to the ball which made it a massacre instead of just a beating.


What amuses me the most is just how easily these fools have succumbed to the great plans of Lord Tzeentch. Us losing the previous game has ensured that this defeat moves the Strongarm not to second but causes them to fall meteorically all the way back to fourth!!! "Any way but down" indeed Coach B"


Just goes to show that what the famous philosopher Play-Doh (or whatever his name was) said is right "You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation." The Strongarm talk a good game but if you dont let them intimidate you they fall apart like Jenga played by hyperactive monkeys (or by the coaching staff of the Skullcrushers... more or less the same thing really)!

Actually this guy looks scarier than most of the Skullcrushers.....

In other games - Coach coffin raised more than just Zombies with a win over the INCREDIBLY VIOLENT Midnight City Nightmare.  While this may have propelled Coach Coffin into the top place in the league I think that the Nightmare were the real winners here as the coaching staff seem to finally be using the strengths and abilities of the players in an effective manner. The team owner was overheard saying "Those zombies may be a pain - but they make for great target practice!"

In additional play the Kroxigoons continue their slow but steady rise to greatness, and the Plague once again show that they can be a serious threat and a dangerous crew. The Hoard, Skullcrushers, Hooligans, Kroxigoons, Crusaders and the Reavers all draw in what appears to be a general stabalising of the challenger (though challenged is perhaps more appropriate....) ranked teams.

That pretty much wraps it up for this edition of N.C.C. News - see you next week time for more action from the Crusader Cup!

Welcome Vanessa!

Today we welcomed a new member to the WhiteTail Neptune Plague:

"She will not be playing on the field, but I assure you she is a great asset to our team!" Says Coach Vallace Morre. "Here she comes...."

As the door swung wide the players squinted to look at what was moving through the opening. It had yellow Teeth and reeked of rotton onions.  It had dirty white fur and wore lipstick smeared across its slavering mouth.  One of its eyes was red with infection and lack of sleep while its clothes were ragged, dirty and torn apart.

"Boys, meet Vanessa Crudgens."

One of the players, Scarface by name, stepped forward looking Vanessa up and down. "She's...she's....SHE"S BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!"

With that the rest of the team stood and applauded their new cheerleader while Coach Vallace Morre slunk away into the dark burrow of his office to scheme and prepare for the next game.

Resentful Day...

Today is the day, where we honour our players.  They fight with gratitude, dedication and courage.  We must respect the one who has fallen to the hands of thy enemy. Gra Manson was new to us and this deadly game that we play, yet he battled as if it were his entire life.  He will not die in vain. and he will not die unhappy.... for we shall not give in to the enemies we face.  We shall work our way up to the top and vanquish many in the finals!

WE SHALL AVENGE GRA MANSON AND WIN THE CRUSADER CUP!

HIS NAME SHALL REST AMOUNGST US FOREVER UNTIL WE END THE LIVES OF THOSE WHO ENDED HIS!!!

A proper memorial serve has been planned to honour Gra Manson. Family, friends and fans are all asked to join us on December 1st 2009 for Bloodwiser and Cheese.

Whitetail Neptune Plague Coach

Vallance Morre

Interview with Coach Beachsilver of the Stronghold’s Strongarm

Could you please introduce the Stronghold’s Strongarm team?
Coach B:  The team is… well it is entirely comprised of Dwarves.  The entire team was part of the Crusade before they called it off and replaced it with a Blood Bowl League.  Although the team is inexperienced in Blood Bowl they’re not inexperienced in combat and have made a good start.

You have already acquired a reputation for playing by the rules, and also enforcing the rules when the other coaches and even the referee have strayed from them.  How did this come about?
Coach B:  Well, yes.  In truth I was never much of fan of Blood Bowl, though I would show up at the local Grudge Bearers game if I could get tickets.  But anyways, on the voyage here I was given a rulebook by a Dwarf who worked at the local arena.  I read that to pass the time.

How have you persuaded the other couches to make amendments?
Coach B:  I usually have a rulebook on hand... and I never go anywhere without my axe and hammer. 

Would this have anything to do with the rumours that the Couch of the Sunday Skullcrushers had numerous bruises after his game with you?

Coach B: Probably.

There is another rumour that I would like to ask you about.  Is the Crusader Cup being made at the Dwarf Stronghold?

Coach B:  There are a lot of smiths who aren’t talking, but there is more activity than a decorative cup could generate.  Also I haven’t heard anything about the Crusader Cup so I can tell you anything for sure.

What direction are you bringing the team from here?
Coach B:  Any way but down. 

Well you are currently at the top - thank you for your time and best of luck with whatever your smiths are building.......
Coach B:  You’re welcome.

In a stunning turn of events the Team Charter of Max's Maniacs was revoked this week!

Commisioner Craig claimed to be shocked and dismayed to discover that the Maniacs were actually a farm team for the Manchester Morgue Fillers. As it turns out the Morgue Fillers decided to hedge their own bets against losses to the morgue by fielding two teams which over the course of the season they planned to join into a single super team made of well trained and experienced survivors.

The league could not stand by and allow such ruthless shennanigans (a testiment to the fact that paying for two teams certainly did not allow enough left over start up capital to convince Commisioner Craig to overlook such brilliant strategy) and so the charter of the Maniacs has been disallowed and the team members banished (whether to the Realm of Chaos or another league has been yet to be confirmed).